photo courtesy of YouTube.
Pegman takes us to Botswana, in Sothern Africa. The challenge – to write a 150 word story Here’s my story.
End of the Day
Here am I, Rapula, scuffing up the dusty road on my way home to the village. Cicadas rattle in the dried up scrub. Been foraging for wild food all day. Anything for us to eat – roots, plants, herbs for medicine. The land is parched, nothing to scavenge for man or beast.
My belly grumbles, Mama won’t be pleased with my half empty basket. She is getting thin. Not enough for a family. We long for the rainy season and plenty of food. Papa may need to go to the town for work, far from our village. I worry for him, what will happen to us ? My boyfriend is already there – miss him so much. I call him on the village phone, if there’s a signal. I long to hear him laugh.
The shadows become darkness, it’s cooler. I wrap my shawl around me. Nearly home, cooking fires, food and my family.
May 4, 2018 at 11:24 pm
Vividly written. A great piece.
April 29, 2018 at 1:31 pm
There is a hunger in this lean yet deeply meaningful prose.
April 30, 2018 at 11:37 am
Thanks Kelvin, I appreciate your feedback.
April 26, 2018 at 7:55 am
I like the tone you’ve taken here, the resignation she feels towards her life and the trials she suffers, the fact that this is just life, no matter how hard. And her hopes for the future make us so want things to improve for her. Lovely story
April 26, 2018 at 5:11 pm
Thank you Lynne, for your appreciative feedback. I didn’t want it to be a story about complete despair, I wanted her to feel loved in spite of the hardships.
April 30, 2018 at 7:29 am
And that really did come across. Very well done
April 24, 2018 at 7:41 pm
I could so feel the dry heat, the lack, the hunger… well done.
April 26, 2018 at 5:08 pm
Thank you Dale, the photo shows such a dry, hot landscape doesn’t it – glad you could imagine it.
April 24, 2018 at 11:34 am
Vividly rendered. You can feel the sun on your neck.
April 24, 2018 at 12:41 pm
Thanks Josh.
April 23, 2018 at 7:04 pm
Kind feedback Karen – thank you. Glad the story touched you.
April 23, 2018 at 4:00 pm
A hard life, especially when necessity breaks a family apart.
April 23, 2018 at 7:01 pm
Yes, it is. Not a lot of choices open to them I think.
April 23, 2018 at 3:46 pm
You bring the young woman’s emotional world vividly to life, with just a few details.
April 23, 2018 at 7:02 pm
Thanks Penny, that is what I hoped to do with the story.
April 23, 2018 at 2:39 pm
This is so lovely and poignant. Left me with goosebumps. I was right there with her.